Super Mario Universe COMPLETELY REVISED VERSION
by BlakeyBoy
Summary: Mario must save the princess with the help of some new friends; Sonic the Hedgehog and Ratchet and Clank.
1. R & R

One fine day in the Mushroom Kingdom, the hero known as Mario was relaxing in his newly-bought hammock.

"Aaaagh..." he sighed in a relaxed tone. "Finally, I get a break from all the hard work I do," he said while getting a sip of lemonade. Suddenly, a cry emenated in the distance.

"MARIO!" he heard the cry.

"Oh, what now!" he shrieked, peering through his shades to see a chubby entity running his direction.

"MARIO! THE PRINCESS! SHE'S BEEN..." the voice was cut off by Mario.

"Look, Toad. I know the drill. She's been captured, I get to save her.

"Oh, thank heavens! Mario, you're the greatest," Toad sighed.

"Yes, Toad, I know." Mario said, promptly getting up and walking inside his small cottage. "If she's so rich, then why am I still living in this craphole?" Toad heard Mario shout from inside.

"Umm...I don't know how to respond to that," Mario heard Toad say in a small voice.

"Well you don't need to," Mario said, walking out of his house in his traditional blue overalls and red shirt, rather than the blue goomba shorts he was previously wearing. He sighed heavily. "Here we go..." he said, moping. He slowly walked toward his backyard.

"Uh...where are you going?" Toad asked.

"The warp pipe to Bowser's castle is in the back. I got tired of going through all the crap to get to him, so last time I defeated him, I installed it," Mario said, hopping into the pipe.

"But Mario, you don't understand. The Princess isn't at Bowser's castle!" Toad yelled.

"What!" was all Mario could manage out before being sucked into the pipe.


	2. Sonic the Hedgehog

Mario was suddenly transported to Bowser's castle. He hit the ground with a thud from the force of being shot through the plumbing equipment. The pipe dissipated into the floor before Mario was able to go back through.

"TOAD!" he screamed at the floor, knowing his attempt was futile. He pounded at the ground several times, however it did nothing. "If she's not at Bowser's castle, then where is she?" Mario wondered to himself. Suddenly, a whirring sound came into contact with Mario's ear. He quickly bounced up off of the floor and screamed, "Who's there!"

Mario was quickly hit out of nowhere and hit the floor, promptly knocking the wind out of him. He saw a blue thing sitting on top of him and instinctively punched it off of him. Before he could finish it off, the ground rumbled before him. He saw a gigantic thwomp fall where he standing before, completely destroying the floor. "Y-you saved me..." Mario said aloud. "W-w-who are you?" Mario asked. He saw the thing get up, and it didn't look happy.

"Sonic," he snapped. It had blue spikes covering it's back and wore what looked like sprinter's shoes. Suddenly, it occured to Mario.

"The hedgehog?" he asked.

"Yeah," he again snapped. "What's it to ya'?" he asked.

"Sorry I punched you. I didn't know, it was you, Sonic," Mario apologized.

"Mario?" Sonic questioned.

"Yep. It's-a me, Mario," he said almost automatically. "...Wait, what exactly are you doing here?" Mario asked.

"I was sitting at home relaxing, when all of the sudden, these three guys jumped me. One was Robotnik, the other was a robot, probably one of his creations, and the other was a fat turtle," Sonic told him.

"Bowser!" Mario cried.

"Yeah...anyways, they dragged me back to this place and offered me a deal; I help them and they don't lock me up. I declined and was locked up for my 'ignorance'," Sonic told him. "But I easily broke free and have been looking for an exit ever since." Sonic said.

"Follow me, I know a way out," Mario told him, quickly running down a corridor. "Now, tell me more about all this," Mario said quickly hopping into another warp pipe in the room he had led Sonic to.


	3. Ratchet

"And that's what happened!" Sonic said as the two were warped out.

"Hey...something's not right here," Mario paused. "Where are we?" he said alloud, noticing he was no longer in his familiar Mushroom Kingdom. They now found themselves in a beach-like area where the only sound for miles was the gurgleof the blue sea. "This isn't the Mushroom Kingdom, or at least not a part I've ever seen," Mario said, confused. "Bowser! He must have changed the exit location of the pipe!" Mario said, a bit louder than he wanted to. "I..." Mario was cut off by Sonic again tackling him. "OOF!" Mario grunted.

"Shhhh...We're not alone..." Sonic whispered, covering Mario's mouth with his hand. Mario and Sonic quickly ran behind a nearby rock and watched. A heavily armored creature layed unconcious on the shore. It was cat-like in appearance and was sprawled out like a dead animal. It held a gun in one outstretched arm and the other was a clenched fist. Suddenly, it began to moan.

"OoOoOhHhHh...my aching head..." it said in a shaken voice. The creature then began to stir.

"H-hello?" Mario said quietly. The creature quickly hopped to it's feet and pulled dual machine pistols at where the sound came from.

"Who's there?" he shrieked. No response. "Answer me!" he cried, firing a round at the rock. The last thing the creature saw before blacking out was a blue flash.

When the creature awoke, it saw Mario and Sonic mere inches from it's face. It quickly reached for the pistols, however quickly learned they were absent from its arsenal.

"Looking for this?" Sonic asked, holding out the pistol in a tormenting manner.

"Gimme that!" it shouted, grabbing at its weapon. Sonic, however, was too quick for it.

"Not until you tell us who you are," Mario told him.

"Why do you need my name?" it said, getting up. "You gonna tell who killed you?" it taunted.

"I sense a mocking tone." Sonic said with a slight smile. He turned to mustached friend. "You know how to use these, don't you?" Sonic said, handing Mario the weapons.

"Why yes, I do," Mario said, taking them. He then put the creature in his crosshairs. "What is your name?" Mario demanded. It sneered.

"Wouldn't you like to know," it snapped.

"Well, actually, we would," Sonic said.

"The name's Ratchet. I came to this planet in search of my friend, Clank, but lost control of my ship and crashed," it told him. "My nemesis, Dr. Nefarious, took him to this planet, expecting me not to follow. He had teamed up with these two fat guys...well...one was more like a monster, but they promised Clank's return if I cooperated. Being who I am, I didn't trust them, and I attacked. They managed to escape on a ship to this place where you two found me." Ratchet told them.

"We asked your name, not your life story," Sonic snapped.

"Wait, Sonic, this guy might be able to help us," Mario said, turning to Ratchet. "These three who took...'Clank,' was it? Was one of them by chance a fat turtle with spikes?" Mario asked him.

"Yeah, that one was the most annoying. He kept going on about this Peach chick and how he had captured her and taken her to this other world or somet..." Ratchet was cut off by Mario.

"Another world?" Mario questioned.

"Yeah...or maybe it was galaxy. I don't remember," Ratchet said.

"Bowser's galaxy. I remember how to get there. So predictable, he is. I betcha your friend is there, too, Ratchet," Mario said confidently. "Will you help us?" Mario asked.

"Are you sure?" Ratchet questioned.

"As sure as I like pasta," Mario proudly said.

"...O-Kay..." Ratchet paused. The three stood in silence which was finally ended by a sigh from Ratchet. He outstretched one armored hand to the plumber, then to the hedgehog. Then Ratchet paused once again. "...So...how do we get there?" Ratchet asked.

"A luma will have to send us into space," Mario told him.

"And where can we find these...'lumas'?" Ratchet asked. Mario stopped.

"I don't know."


	4. Aphelion

"What do you mean you don't know!" Ratchet shrieked. "Where are they usually?" he questioned.

"Well, usually they reside in space," Mario said. "However, they do come down for the Star festival," Mario told him.

"How often does this festival happen?" Ratched asked, hoping for a good answer.

"About every hundred years or so," Mario said his estimate. Sonic and Ratchet's jaws dropped simultaneously, gaping wide open.

"One hundred years! I could have circled the world 1000 times in that amount of time!" Sonic cried.

"Unlike you, I don't have a hundred years," Ratchet snapped. "Come help me repair Aphelion and we'll be on our way in no time at all." Ratchet told them.

"What's an 'Aphelion?'" Sonic questioned.

"That's my ship," Ratchet said proudly while walking towards the crater where the ship had crash-landed.

"Let me get this straight. You named your starship?" Mario asked.

"Yes. Do you have a problem with that?" Ratchet snarled, gritting his teeth. Mario's eyes became wide.

"No! Not at all! In fact, I think that's very cute that you named your s..." Mario was cut off by Ratchet tackling him. Ratchet pulled a wrench and held it tight over the plumber's throat.

"It's not cute. She is one of the last remnants of my civilization," Ratchet whispered harshly. Suddenly, it occured to Mario.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know of your past, *coughs* so I am truly sorry." Ratchet heaved a heavy sigh and stood up, helping Mario up after himself.

"It's not your fault. You didn't know," Ratchet said sadly.

"Can we hurry this along?" Sonic snapped impatiently.

"Can it, bushpig, and help me find the missing parts to my ship!" Ratchet shrieked.

"Arrogance VS. Rage, hmmm...this could get interesting," Mario said aloud. He then walked over to help Ratchet find parts to his ship. After several hours of searching, the trio had found every last part, but a missing transmission. The three looked by the crash site, but found it nowhere. Then, in the distance, Ratchet noticed a dark spot in the sand.

"The transmission!" Ratchet cried, running towards the spot. "Hang on Clank, here I co...AAAAAAHHHHH!" Ratchet screamed as he fell into a pit. Sonic grabbed Mario and quickly dashed to the pit in a split second. It was dark and seemingly bottomless.

"RATCHET!" screamed Sonic.

"I'm okay!" they heard a scream back. "Except for these big black balls on chains. Either of you guys know what they a...HEY! One just bit me.

"Chain Chomps!" was all Mario could manage out.


	5. Chain Chomp Challenge

"What?" Ratchet yelled back at Mario.

"Stay still, Ratchet...no wait, MOVE RATCHET!" Mario shrieked.

"Gotcha!" he shouted. However, it was too late, for the Chain Chomp grabbed the lombax between its teeth before Ratchet was able to move. "GOD THOSE THINGS ARE FAST!" Ratchet screamed. However, while being mauled, Ratchet noticed that his transmission lay in the belly of the beast. He saw it portruding deep in the monster's throat. "I know this is a bad time, but I found the transmission!" Ratchet said sheepishly while being violently shaken around.

"Hoold on!" Mario shouted, jumping into the hole. He landed beside the attacking Chain Chomp and went to help Ratchet, however he was quickly cut off by a loud snort. He turned to see yet another angry Chain Chomp charging in his direction. Mario was completely unprepared and braced for impact, however, it didn't hit him. Seconds passed and Mario carefully opened his eyes. He then saw Sonic standing atop a partially buried Chain Chomp, his spin dash being so fast it pushed it into the ground. The hedgehog looked up at Mario. "Thanks!" Mario said gratefully.

"Don't mention it," Sonic said to him before turning to see Ratchet struggling.

"Bullets just bounce off these things!" he shrieked while still being held in its large jaws.

"They're virtually invincible, Ratchet! They can't be stopped, only slowed," Mario cried out, running to his aid.

"Thanks for the memo!" Ratchet struggled to spit through gritted teeth as he continued to hold the monstrosity off. Mario attempted to knock the chomp backwards with his fireball, however this only heated it's metallic body. "Burning to the touch!" Ratchet screamed, putting a hand to the Chomp's body. "Thanks a million!" he mocked. Mario and Sonic then both realized the severity of their situation. While on scorching hot, immortal monster fought their furry friend, another was slowly making its way out of the ground. However, the situation quickly got worse. A low growl could be heard from what seemed to be a cave in the bottom of the pit.

"What now!" Mario shrieked. Before Mario was able to see what made the barely audible sound, he heard a large grunt. Ratchet landed beside the two and held one pistol in his hand. Before he could fire, the Chomp lunged. All three instinctively covered their faces, however, by what seemed like luck, they were missed. Mario opened his eyes, hoping to see Sonic again on top of the Chomp. However, this was not what he saw.

"It's restricted by its chain," Mario heaved a sigh of relief.

"Not for long!" Ratchet shouted, pointing to the chain that was being pushed to its full limit.

"I think we have bigger problems..." Sonic said worriedly.

"What could possibly...be...bigger...?" Mario said, pausing twice because of the shock he received.

Several loose Chomps began rolling towards the trio. They had no chains to restrict them from a certain area, including the area that housed the three heroes.

"Desperate times call for desperate measures!" Sonic shouted before quickly running in circles around the rolling Chomps. Several of them followed the hedgehog in several circles before accidently colliding and smashing each other. A few other rollers, as Mario now named them, had a different idea. They realized the furry and fat targets would be much easier targets to destroy.

"The only then that can beat them is them!" Mario shouted. Ratchet gave him a confused look.

"Say what?" Ratchet questioned.

"Follow my lead!" Mario said, jumping in front of the Chain Chomp with the rapidly breaking chain. "OVER HERE!" Mario shouted at the rollers. A few followed him, while the others followed Ratchet who did the same with the buried Chain Chomp. All of the Chomps met their demise when the plumber and the lombax jumped out of the way, like a bullfighter would pull his cape. Bits of metal flew everywhere and Ratched glanced at the rubble, and by some miracle, spotted the transmission.


	6. Transmission

The trio emerged from the pit bruised and bloodied, however, Ratchet held the transmission high, as though it were a trophy. "That was some fight, huh?" Ratchet said out loud.

"Yeah. Usually you can just jump over them," said Mario.

"Yep," Sonic replied.

"Well, it's all over now," Ratchet proudly said aloud, putting the transmission in.

"Rebooting! Initiate! All systems go!" The three heard a female, robotic voice say.

"How typical. A robot," Sonic said out loud.

"Excuse me?" the voice recoiled.

"A robot...with feelings?" Sonic questioned, confuced.

"At your service, Ratchet," the voice said.

"Thank you, Aphelion," Ratchet said, hopping in. Mario and Sonic stood dumbfounded. Ratchet looked through his windshield at the two standing there. "Are you gonna end up in the passenger seats, or embedded in my space radiator?" Ratchet mocked. This was all the two needed two get into the ship quickly. While Mario and Sonic buckled their seatbelts, Ratchet waited for the coordinates from Mario. Mario looked to see Ratchet staring at him.

"What?" Mario said, almost afraid of the leer from Ratchet.

"...How do you get there?" Ratchet asked.

"Let's see, you hop in a star thing, then you shake the Wii remote, and you fly towar-" Mario was cut off by Ratchet screaming.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT! I WANTED THE COORDINATES!" Ratchet screeched.

"If you wanted the coordinates, you could have just said, 'give me the coordinates,' you know?"  
Mario told him. Ratchet's gritted teeth turned to a neutral expression.

"You don't even know what coordinates are, do you?" Ratchet questioned.

"Something to do with wall outlets, right?"


	7. Luigi

Ratchet heaved a heavy sigh. "You're getting us nowhere fast," he said.

"Pardon me for asking, but how is that possible?" Sonic butted in.

"UGH!" Ratchet grunted. "If you aren't going to get us there, I will!" Ratchet shrieked at Mario. "Aphelion, set coordina-" Ratchet was cut off by a voice that sounded similar to Mario's.

"Mario! Where are you going..." the voice paused. "Without me!" they heard the voice shriek. The three turned towards the voice right before hearing a huge thud on the windshield. They all turned back to a see a tall, green figure on the windshield. "Go Weegee..." they heard a muffled voice say.

"Luigi?" Mario said out loud. The figure pulled itself off of the windshield.

"No, a talking potato," Luigi mocked. Suddenly he tripped. This was to the amusement of Sonic and Ratchet, but not Mario.

"Why did you use the windshield wipers on my brother!" Mario cried.

"Oh, sorry," Ratchet giggled before turning on the wiper fluids. Luigi gurgled.

"Quit!" Mario said, striking Ratchet's head.

"OW! Ok, ok...jeez...can't a guy have a little fun," Ratchet said, stopping the fluids and helping Luigi inside. "As I was saying, Aphelion, set course for...Bowser Galaxy...thingy..."

"As you wish, Ratchet," Aphelion said before launching into space.


	8. Crash Landing

"What in the world is that?" Ratchet screeched, pointing to a large planetoid. It had the faceial features sof an overgrown turtle and was sucking in small planets and asteroids around it.

"Bowser's galaxy..." Mario said in a low voice.

"Aphelion, ready landing gear," said Ratchet.

"Negative," the ship said. "The gravitational force of this planetoid is too strong. All systems are offline. Prepare for crash landing," the ship said.

"What! Um...what about the back-up generator?" Ratchet said nervously.

"Negative. Brace for impact," the said Aphelion in her feminine voice.

"Fasten your seatbelts, guys. We're comin' in hot!" Ratchet yelled over the beeping controls. He attempted to veer the ship away, however his attempt was futile.

"I know this is probably a bad time, but I've got to use the little hedgehog's room!" Sonic screamed.

"What!" Ratchet shrieked, turning. He had no time to yell, for the ship began to shake violently. "AAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGHHHHHH!" they all screamed in unison.

"Crash landing in 5," Aphelion paused. "4. 3. 2. 1..." the ship was cut off by an extremely loud sound. The sound was of the explosion caused by the harsh landing. From under the rubble came nothing at first. After several minutes, a hand with a dirtied white glove emerged from what had been the cockpit. Luigi emerged, having been the only one not to freak out...at first.

He looked around before being pushed backward by a force below him. Ratchet pulled himself out of the rubble from where Luigi had sat down, followed by Mario and Sonic. They all paused. Then, as if practiced, Sonic, Mario, and Luigi all shouted cries of joy simultaneously. Ratchet heaved a heavy sigh. "Two crash landings can really wear a guy out...and damage a ship," He then patted the debris softly. "Don't worry girl. I'll have you fixed up in no time," he sweetly said. Mario looked at him strangely, then turned to Sonic.

"If you've got to go to the bathroom, go now," he said. Sonic looked at him sheepishly.

"Done,"


	9. Bowser Galaxy

The four walked for what seemed like an eternity, finally ending when they were met by a shadow overcoming them.

"Huh?" Sonic grunted, looking up in unison with the other three. The three looked up to see a small airship with a clown face propelling towards them slowly.

"Bowser!" Mario and Luigi shouted. Suddenly and out of nowhere, a robo-walker appeared out of nowhere, walking towards them. It had a large dome covering it's top.

"Robotnik!" Sonic screeched. Suddenly, a large energy blast knocked them all backwards. They all looked up to see a giant robot creature with a large, red laser gun portruding from it's chest.

"Bio-Bliterater? Nefarious!" Ratchet shrieked. Sonic quickly got into a sprinter's stance.

"What are you-" Mario was cut off by Sonic exploding forward in a burst of pure speed. He watched as a blue blur jumped several hundred feet off the ground, ramming into the giant robot's back. It fell forward from the immense speed of the attack, crushing both the Koopa Clown Car and the robo-walker. Sonic then dashed back to his friends.

"Well, that was easy," he said confidently. Mario, Luigi, and Ratchet gaped.

"...Then where are our friends?" Mario asked. Sonic paused.

"Uh...I dunno," Sonic said stupidly. Before Mario could say anything else, a loud boom echoed throughout the galaxy. The four turned and watched in awe as a gigantic castle slowly rose from the ground. After finally emerging completely, 3 entities stood at the top of the highest dark turret. Mario then put two and two together.

"That was a trick!" Mario screeched. A loud growl caught his ear. It came from very close by. "...or it could've been a trap,"


	10. Mother Tyhrranoid

Mario shuddered, then slowly turned. He was met by the teeth of a very large monstrosity. It had several dozen eyes and a gigantic mouth. It stood around 60 feet tall and had a large turret on its back, not blending at all with its green skin. It let out a mighty roar.

"Mother tyhrranoid..." Ratchet said out loud.

"Tyhrra-what?" Luigi blurted. The monstrosity jumped up into the air and landed on its belly. The turret raised up, though upside down, and began firing several red rounds at the heroes. Sonic snarled, then dashed forward, smashing into its turret. However, this only made the turret spin around wildly, firing in every different direction. They all ducked, however, then, the monster got up. Ratchet quickly pulled a gun that was oozing a strangle blue liquid and fired it at the mother tyhrranoid. This completely froze it for almost half-of-a second before it broke free of its icy coffin. It bellowed before Ratchet pulled a disco-ball-like weapon from his arsenal.

"What the?" Mario questioned as Ratchet threw it. The disco ball hit the ground before levitating into the air with a catchy tune. Suddenly and for no apparent reason, Mario, Sonic, Luigi, and the monster, all began dancing.

"Why am I dancing?" Sonic shouted as he started windmilling, his legs flying around.

"I don't know!" Mario yelled as he began waltzing.

"Go Weegee, Go Weegee!" said Luigi as he did the worm.

"Hey, look!" shouted Mario. The three watched as Ratchet shot and hit the monstrosity as it jumped around dancing. Suddenly, the music stopped. The three hit the ground, tired from the involuntary dancing. So did the mother tyhrranoid, succumbing to its injuries. It hit the ground with a thud and grunt, Ratchet smashing one of its eyes in victory.

"Nice," said Sonic.

"Great job!" Luigi told him. Mario paused.

"Could've done better, but good job," he said, sarcastically.

"Yeah, right..." said Ratchet.

"Uh...guys..." Luigi stammered, scared.

The four turned to see that a giant turtle stood around fifteen feet away from them, staring with cold eyes. Suddenly, a blue robot with a green glass covering on it's head emerged from behind him, along with a fat man with a mustache in a robotic vehicle that looked much like the Koopa Clown Car, yet not painted. They all stared at their enemies, with the robot finally breaking the silence.

"Hello, Ratchet..." it said in a gruff voice.

"We know you are, but what are we?" Luigi shouted. They all turned and stared, before the robot spoke again.

"Normally, I'd never associate with a squishy, however, Dr. Robotnik here...well, his name says it all. This Bowser fellow, here, just seemed to be in the right place at the right time. Plus, he supplied us the galaxy, which we are very thankful for." said the robot.

"You'll never get away with this, Nefarious..." Ratchet paused. "What exactly are you doing, again?" he questioned. Before Nefarious could answer, Sonic tackled him.

"Where are our friends, creation of Robotnik!"he shrieked, throwing insanely fast punches towards his cranium. The robot, however, was too fast, as he quickly knocked him off with ease.

"What! You think Robotnik created me? MWA HA HA HA H..." suddenly the robot stopped and a space opera came on. Bowser then slapped the robot's head, causind the gears to turn again. "A HA HA HA HA! I was once a squishy like you. However, that dope Captain Quark turned me into this! And since then, I've grown a hatred for all organic life forms!" he screeched.

"I have one question," Luigi asked. Nefarious turned to him. "What is _organic?_ Food with no pesticides?"


	11. Robots AGAIN!

"If you don't know what organic means, I can't help you. That is also beside the point," said Nefarious. "These two will not be organic much longer anyways," he said, talking about Bowser and Robotnik.

"What!" was the reaction from both of them.

"Did I not tell you?" he said as he quickly pressed a button on a remote that seemed to be pulled out of nowhere. Suddenly, a light beam from above them nearly blinded them as they slowly span in circles. Then more quickly, finally ending with a dizzy, all out spin. After the spinning was done with, the two villains were revealed to have become robots.

"Wha?" the four heroes shouted in unison.

"How's that possible?" questioned Luigi.

"I know this sounds strange, but I think we have to help them," said Mario. The other three gaped. "It's our duty as heroes. They really didn't sound like they wanted to be turned into robots, did they?" said Mario. They all nodded.

"I guess," said Ratchet.

"You actually think you can turn them back? MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA! This process is irreversible, you stupid squishy! They are loyal robots in my metal armada! These robots have no free -will, and therefore-" Nefarious was cut off by a voice.

"You call it irreversible? I call it a challenge," said a now roboticised Dr. Robotnik. (the irony) Nefarious stared.

"How is that possible?" he said aloud. Suddenly, Bowser appeared, testing his new flamethrower breath...that could continue for long periods of time. He growled in agreement. "No matter, you will still not stop my evil plans," said Nefarious.

"What evil plans?" snapped Sonic.

"I plan to rule this world. Countless squishies to turn into robots to add to my evil army. To me, this is paradise! They cannot defend themselves from anything, for they are to consumed in their own civil wars that they won't even know they were turned into my robotic slaves! MWA HA HA HA HA HA!" screeched Nefarious. He looked to see Sonic staring back.

"Start again at 'I'"


	12. Mecha Bowser

"Well, no matter. Even ir you have free wills, you still won't be able to stop me! MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" screeched Nefarious.

"Do you do that often?" Luigi asked. Nefarious glared.

"How exactly do you plan to do this with us around, Nefarious?" Ratchet confidently asked.

"Simple!" he shrieked, pulling a remote. He pushed the largest button, causing a gigantic tremor to shake everything. Ratchet, Mario, Sonic, Luigi, Bowser, and Robotnik fell backwards. Suddenly, a gigantic object began rising from the ground. As it slowly emerged, it was revealed to be a gigantic metal Bowser.

"Mecha-Bowser!" Mario shrieked. However, he quickly realized this wasn't just Mecha-Bowser, but it was greatly improved, such as gigantic blades emerging from it's claws and laser guns on its shoulders. They all turned to Robotnik.

"How was I supposed to know he'd turn on me?" said Robotnik. Sonic glared. They then all turned to see Nefarious jump into the cockpit. He laughed maniacally, and everyone, but Luigi hid behind a nearby boulder. Luigi stood his ground as the gigantic metal monster approached.

"What're you doing, idiot?" Sonic screamed. No response.

"Luigi! Get back here!" Mario cried. Still no response. "LUIGI!" Mario screamed.

"What?" he replied from behind him. Mario turned to him. He noticed he was only in his koopa boxers.

"What the! How're you over here...and why are you in your underwear?" Mario shrieked. Luigi then pointed. They all looked over to see that, upon closer inspection, it was a rock with Luigi's clothes on.

"What did that accomplish!" Ratchet screamed at him. He again pointed to the giant Bowser-look-a-like walking towards the rock.

"Green idiot! Soon you'll be merely gum on my shoes! MWA HA HA HA HA!" Nefarious shrieked, raising the robot's foot. The monstrous foot crashed down on the rock, completely smashin through the metal on it's foot. This caused the wiring in the legs to be severed, completely paralyzing the gaint robot.

They all cheered at Luigi, screaming "great job," and "good thinking." Luigi sat dumbfounded.

"What'd I do?"


	13. Malfunctions

"NO!" Nefarious screeched over the 'Malfunction' roars of the machine.

"Lower quadrant has been disabled. All systems down," a prerecorded voice said with no emotion at all.

"What!" Nefarious shouted in disbelief as suddenly, all of the flashing buttons and beeping stopped completely. He sat in darkness for several seconds before turning on a backup generator to launch the ejector seat. Mario, Luigi, Sonic, Robtnik, Bowser, and Ratchet all watched in awe as a small hatch on top of Mecha-Bowser's head opened up and a blue blur flew upward before suddenly stopping with the explosion of a parachute. "This isn't over!" Nefarious shrieked over the whirs of the machine. Suddenly, a flash of light lit up the sky as Mecha-Bowser explded. Sonic glared as the robot laughed maniacally as he descended safely. Bowser growled, then, without thinking, picked up Luigi and cocked his arm back. Memories of trowing the javelin in _Mario and Sonic at The Olympic Games _flooded metallic Bowser's memory chip and he chucked the green plumber as hard as he could at Nefarious.

"Uh oh," Nefarious muttered to hisself as Luigi ripped through his parachute. Luigi became lodged in the air-cushion as the two plummeted to the ground.

"LUIGI!" Mario shouted, running towars the landing spot. Sonic easily passed him and jumped into the air towards the parachute. Suddenly, the parachute crashed into the ground with a cloud of dust.

"L-Luigi?" Mario stuttered. As the dust cleared, it revealed a shaken Luigi standing alone. They all stared in awe as he hit the ground on his face. Suddenly, a low sound caught all of their ears.

"Goooooooooooooooooooo..." it seemed to sound like. All of them looked around, trying to find the source of the sound. Suddenly, Luigi flew upward in a movement of complete happiness. "WEEGEE!" he screamed. hey all cheered as he ran forward. A gloved hand emerged from the rubble, revealing Sonic to be alive as well. They all cheered once more as their friends were alive, yet their enemy was dead. As they all shook hands and thanked each other, an unstable, mechanical voice cut through their happiness.

"This isn't over..." Nefarious said in a completely robotic voice. "Malfunction...danger...I...over...isn't..." he said in a range of tones. Suddenly, he shook his head quickly, completely clearing his problems. He then pulled a blaster on all of them. The heroes raised their hands up in defeat, knowing they had finally lost. "Yes...yes..." Nefarious said to himself. "IIIII'VVE WWWWWOOOOOOOO..." suddenly, Nefarious's usual voice was overtaken by a space opera. They all stared in awe as Luigi, being the most heroic of all time, walked over, stopped, a blew, propmptly causing the robot to fall over. They all cheered him as he walked over. They picked him up and threw him up in the air as he happily shouted. Suddenly, he hit the ground with a thud as they forgot to catch him. Luigi picked himself up, brushed himself off, then turned to Nefarious's robotic shell.

"How ironic,"


	14. The End

2 months later...

Mario sighed as he sat on the couch. The only sound inside the house was that of Luigi's incessant singing in the shower. Though Christmas was coming up soon, Mario still disagreed with Luigi's song of choice.

_"Jingle Bells! Mario smells! Yoshi layed an egg! Princess Peach stepped on a leech and Bowser got away!" _in a completely off tune voice. This caused Mario much dismay. He was completely bored, as nothing had happened since he had met his new friends, Sonic and Ratchet. He remembered that day vividly.

Sonic easily made his way over the remains of what once was Mecha Bowser and noticed that they had never found their friends.

"Hey...something's wrong here..." said Luigi.

"You think? The only thing wrong here is you!" Ratchet shouted. Bowser and Robotnik growled in agreement. Suddenly and out of nowhere, Sonic accidentally tripped over a small lever and a light beam engulfed Bowser and Robotnik. After several seconds, it appeared they had turned back to original form.

"Irreversible my-" Mario was quickly cut off by a scream of terror. He looked up to see that their friends were tied up to a large post that was before hidden by the rubble. Around it were several Rollers, chomps without chains as Mario had named them. As they began rolling towards them, a growl from Bowser stopped them in their tracks. He shrieked several indescribable sounds, then, the Rollers rolled away.

"What'd he say?" Luigi asked. Robotnik turned to him.

"He said chili dogs were half-off today at the Get-N-Get-Out...or to heel," he told him. Sonic dashed over to the post and easily untied them. A small robot fell from the rope, then screeched in a robotic voice, "RATCHET!"

"Clank!" Ratchet shrieked as he ran over to him and picked him up. It uttered a Scooby-Doo-like laugh, blinking it's light green eyes.

"Princess!" Mario and Luigi shouted. They quickly ran over to her.

"Thank you all so much," she paused. "Except you, lardo..." she muttered to Bowser. He growled, then shrugged it off. "I now proclaim cake for everyone!" she screamed. They all cheered, except Mario. He stared at her. His eyes squinted, then he began to speak.

"I've saved you more times than you can count. I've endured spiky freaks falling from the ceiling to giant worms that turn red and kill you when you touch them! I've had countless accidents, yet do any of your loyal servents care about me? NO! They just want their prettly little damsel-in-distress back!" Mario shrieked. Peach gave him a disgusted look, then shouted, "What about Super Princess Peach!" she screamed.

"We all know the japanese guy who created us is insane! I'm not going to be captured! Why would Bowser capture me rather than capture you, the little, dainty girl who can't even fix her own breakfast! You have those poor Toad's overworked, and me overworked. Honestly, I don't know why I do it. Apparently it's a force of habit, because the reward I get is a cake. A cake every time! You think a measly cake is going to make up for ALL OF THE CRAP I DO!" Mario screamed. Peach felt very, very, very small.

"Yes?" she squeaked.

"WELL IT'S NOT! And, truth be told, I've never even had your cake. The closest I've ever come to eating it was it becoming frozen on the screen in Mario 64!" he screamed. Suddenly, Mario's rage finally accumulated itself into the two most powerful words in the Mushroom Kingdom, or any kingdom for that matter.

"I HATE YOU!"

Mario shrieked. Suddenly, tears filled her eyes as she ran away crying. Silence fell for several seconds before Luigi broke it.

"Nice job. Now we don't get cake!"


End file.
